Recently, I had someone guide me through a healing process about my fear of falling. I am sure you can imagine as I am recovering from a fall last November, that this fear was interfering with my healing progress. For this first time, it became imperative that I heal this fear.
We started by talking about the memories that I had with falling. Recent or past. I listed a bunch and we started. This process took me to heal the first surgery I had. Even though I am sure that no one dropped me when I had tubes put in my ears at 18 months, I had that sensation. There were other memories and feelings of anger to deal with. Then I was taken to a memory I hadn't listed.
When I was twelve, I had tied a jump rope to a gate and proceeded to swing on it. The rope broke and I fell on my tailbone. The bruised tailbone was so excruciatingly painful. The doctors made it worse by forcing me to sit on it. I seriously can't think of a more painful experience.
This experience had so much emotion in it. I was sobbing and I had no clue it was there all along. I didn't know the feelings toward myself were there. I didn't know my feelings towards doctors were there. I didn't know my feelings toward God were there. So many feelings. So much betrayal by God for allowing it to happen.
It isn't hard to see that when I fell last November, these hidden feelings were triggered. It wasn't just the fear of going to doctors that were triggered, but I definitely felt that fear, especially that they would want me to do things that would hurt it more. I went to each appointment with apprehension. It was also that hidden anger and betrayal associated with God. Those hidden feelings were brought to the surface. I had no clue they were there, and yet they were affecting my whole life. It's why it was so hard to believe His promises even after I addressed the beliefs about promises kept.
As the remaining layers get healed, I find myself forgiving and trusting God again. I have found myself wanting to clear out all of the muck in the way of my connection with him. I have been asking Him to remove the resistance and open my heart. My daughter was surprised by this story. Her experience of me didn't allow for the idea that I could be so angry at God. I, myself was surprised at how much there was.
How much energy do you have buried deep? Maybe it doesn't affect your relationship with God. Maybe it doesn't make you afraid of doctors. Maybe it is keeping you single. Maybe it is keeping you sick. It's just this intense energy that you buried. Remember, I didn't even list that memory as one associated with falling. That's how deep it was buried. I remembered the experience but I didn't remember with any emotions because I had buried them so deep. Yet, there was always a heaviness with the memory.
Right now, a lot of deep feelings are being stirred in people. We want to get them out because even if we can't remember them, they are affecting us. They bring down our overall vibrations, they prevent us from receiving all we need. Sometimes we don't even need to know what they are, we just need to clear the energy. Sometimes you need to go into them to see how they connect. You will be led to the right tools for the situation. I trust that.
I'm here for you. Send me a message and we'll talk about what I can do for you as a friend or a healer. If money keeps you from talking to people, please don't allow that. I can do a lot for you for free or trades. I want to see you release these deep feelings so you can experience a life of peace, joy love, affluence, etc.
With love from my heart to yours,
Michele
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