Failure?

I am a failure and so are you. Before you freak out, let me explain.

Our entire life we have been fed expectations. How to look, how to dress, how to talk, what to think, who to like, how to serve, etc. For some of us, this has been extreme. There was a critical person in my life making the expectations more drastic and I know I'm not the only one.

I just watched the movie “Turning Red” and there was a line in it that was so triggering for me. I sobbed. The main character screamed at her mom, “I'm sorry; I'm not perfect like you.” That was so hard for me because even in the last year of my mom's life, I had screamed that same line at her. Every time I didn't do things the way she wanted, every time there was a critical slur thrown my way, I knew I didn't meet her expectations. I felt like a failure and like I would never measure up or be enough.

Here are some things to consider. She said those things because she felt them about herself. She too was striving to be perfect and spent her days with an inner critic saying awful things to herself. She too believed she was not enough and would never measure up.

More importantly, I could not ever live up to her expectations. That's the truth. I couldn't because number one, they were unrealistic expectations. Number two, I am a completely different person. I am motivated by different things. I have experienced different things. I see the world through different lenses. I would have to completely change me into her ideal version of herself in order to achieve her version of perfection. Her ideal wasn't even based on her soul's point of view, it was all the expectations she was fed.

Who told us what was perfect? Our parents, society, church, and even what we thought they implied but didn't say. How many of those ideas are based on the real you? on God's truth? Are they giving you guidelines based on your uniqueness in the world? Of course not.

Based on the fact that none of these ideas are taking into consideration the soul that is you, it is literally impossible to achieve this perfection. Therefore, we are all failures. YAY for that because do you really want to change yourself into some idea of perfect that has nothing to do with you? I don't want to succeed at their ideals. In this way, I want to be a failure.

It's important for us to redefine what failure means and even what perfection means. My new definition is: Failure is not meeting outside expectations. The reality is, when we get in tune with what our soul desires, we are so excited to be that way and do those things that we don't quit, we don't fail UNLESS we still have outside expectations getting in our way.

Who would you be without the expectations of the world, your family, etc? What would you do? 

Sometimes that's hard. We have been so busy trying to be what everyone wants, we forget who we are. For me, I ask God to give me insight into my truth. I also tune into those times when I do feel expansive, blissful, and at peace. I know that is the real me. If I were making decisions from that place, what would I decide?

The truth is, since failure is meeting outside expectations, I want to be a failure. I want to be ME. The beautiful, calm, peaceful me that is so full of love. From that space, how could I ever choose in a way that would harm me or those I love?

Some of you Obligers are freaking out. (See last week's post if you don't know what I mean.) I know you are wired to meet the expectations of others. Maybe a solution would be seeking God's True expectations, after all, if you believe in God do you really want to disappoint? Or, maybe it's about not letting down your soul. There is a solution for you to let go of the false ideas of perfection.

The next time you catch yourself thinking, “I am such a failure at _____,” look at what external expectations you aren't meeting. Who told you what being a good mom looks like? Who told you what being a good wife looks like? Who told you what being a good person looks like? As the song says, “Who said you're not perfect?” What would you choose if you listened to your soul?

With love from my heart to yours,

Michele

Life Facilitator

I'm inviting you to wake up and live!

Embracing the Feelings

Woohoo, two weeks in a row. I must be on a roll!

I am nervoucited. I am teaching my first HomeVision course this week. It’s a 3-week class starting on Thursday, Aug 27. (I would love to see you there)

I know that the information is powerful. I know that the people who have used the information I am teaching have had some pretty profound results. I know I am an expert in this field. For those reasons, I am excited.

Then comes the doubt which makes me nervous. Do you do that? Do you doubt your gifts and expertise? What if no one comes? What if they don’t like me? What if they think it was a waste of their money, even though it is only $27? All of the what-ifs come in. I know we all do this to some degree or another.

Usually, or at least in the past, when the what-if would come, I would try to avoid it. Maybe I would even try to release it. I might find success and I might not.

One of the reasons it is not successful is because I am approaching it from a place of resistance. What we resist persists. I’m fighting the beliefs and fears. Because I am fighting them and wanting to change them out of fear, they persist.

There is a fun little trick that takes the wind right out of their sails. Embrace them, love them.

To embrace them, we start by acknowledging them. “I have this fear. I am afraid of looking like a fool.” Once I have acknowledged what it is, it has already lost a piece of its power. It is no longer hidden. 

Then we say “I am embracing this. I feel this. In fact, I want to feel it bigger than this. I grow this fear. I really feel into this fear.” That takes out so much more power. We are no longer resisting. We are moving into it. We are becoming one with it. All it wants is to be felt and known. 

After that comes the magic step. “I love this. I love this fear of looking like a fool.” We repeat the steps. Acknowledge beliefs and feelings. Embrace them. Grow them. Love them. 

After a while, you won’t even be able to find the feelings anymore. The power of love just takes them completely away. We didn’t resist, it doesn’t persist.

One key is to approach this as a resting opportunity, not a changing opportunity. Sometimes things don’t completely change. The circumstances may not. My mother will always be dead but the feelings can go, they can change, I can be at peace.

The point of embracing is not to change. It is to come to a place of peace. I don’t go into my feelings wanting them to go away. When I do, they take longer to release. I need to go in with the intent to be at peace. Listen to my feelings and thoughts, love them for what they are, and allow myself to be peace. The fact that feelings usually leave is a bonus.

I hope you found this extra helpful.

If you want to be a part of the HomeVision program, here is the link. There are going to be replays so even if you can’t make it to the live classes, that’s ok.

Lots of love,

Michele

Intuitive Healer

Healing homes and the Soul's who love them.

Buried Feelings About God

This blog has been so hard to write. I just haven't known what to say.

It's been a crazy time for me. I knew surgery would be interesting, I didn't expect it to wipe me out the way it did. It wasn't just that there was more pain, it was that I was downright exhausted too.

This month, our roof started leaking. I personally, associate the roof with God, higher self, or other crown chakra energy. Of course, being me, I had to look at what was going on.

Water leaks often can be associated with grief or tears. Did I have a lot of grief with God? I didn't really know. I was trying to address it, did energy work on the home and self. It seemed to get cleared and yet, it leaked again.

Then I did a technique from Rachel Archelaus. She teaches Intuitive Art, which is another way to find out what is going on when you just can't find the answers looking straight on.

I was doing this process for issues with reading my scriptures. Why wasn't I reading? My results were interesting. There was some anger, some disconnect, and way over on the side, there was a big ball of sadness. There is that sadness idea again.

I took to healing. Why was I angry? Why was I sad? I have been dealing with a lot of layers but I want to tell you about one.

I was promised in three different blessings that I would heal quickly. A week ago, as of writing this, I was told that in a week I would be able to be off of the crutches, still using the brace. Well, here I am, not only am I still on the crutches, but a spider scare caused me to jerk my knee into a place of great pain so I couldn't put any weight on my leg for a while.

I lost it. I cried about broken promises and feeling betrayed. Promises of a sweetheart. Promises of healing, and it's not going so fast. Promises of a “beautiful home with the necessities of life”. I have so many promises given to me in priesthood blessings that aren't coming true that I feel anger and betrayal. This is showing up in this intuitive art, in my home leak, and in this overall depression I have had in the last little while.

It's hard to admit that I have been angry and felt hurt and betrayed by God. No wonder I haven't wanted to read scriptures and I have not had much desire to return to church when I do get better. I love the scriptures and I love church and I believe it to be true but there are all these hurt feelings.

With awareness comes healing. Now I know where to heal the deepest hurts. I know what I am really feeling so I can really deal with it.

Do you have similar things going on in your life? Feelings you just can't figure out. Maybe you have signs coming at you in your body, your home, or even through different intuitive methods. Are you giving yourself permission to receive the messages and go deep into healing? I sure hope so. If you need help, I'm super happy to help you come to a place of peace.

With love from my heart to yours,

Michele

Intuitive Healer

Healing homes and the Soul's who love them.

Peace in the Consequences

As I energetically brought my home to mind for healing, I saw or rather didn't see the foundation. Where the foundation was meant to be was an empty space. Is it any wonder that I ended up in a pile on the floor of my job? No foundation to stand on in my home. That's just a representative of what is going on inside of me.

As I was healing my Soul, I spoke with a part of me that was angry and hurt. She'd “kicked the leg out from under me.” She had much regret because she didn't know that the consequence would be so great. A hurt and frustrated part of me just wanted attention and to be heard. This created a severe sprain that may even need surgery.

As I was doing these healings, I became aware of a reality that in some ways I wish wasn't. At the same time, I am at peace with it. Our energy creates circumstances and we can heal that energy but most of the time, the consequence has to finish out. Although miracles can happen, there are some areas that either won't have or likely won't have miracles.

If I have a torn ligament or two, the chance of them reattaching themselves is pretty slim. Maybe with the right tools and beliefs, it could happen. Maybe there is a reason beyond my current understanding of why that won't happen. I only know that I had a peaceful awareness that I would have consequences and it could include surgery.

I am reminded of a woman who fell off a cliff. She will be in a wheelchair for the rest of her life. There isn't much she can do about it. Healing the cause of her fall won't cure her. A criminal who changes his ways, a true conversion from crime will still have consequences to account for in his life. Does that mean the healing shouldn't be done? Does it mean the criminal shouldn't change his ways?

What if my healing now prevents complications? What if my healing now causes my knee to heal very fast? What if my healing now prevents a repeat injury or other future pains that are common after such an injury? The woman in the wheelchair could find a renewed energy for life, or even prevent future organ damage as a result of healing. The man sitting in jail who has had a reform could get a lesser punishment and even prevent a future punishment that would be far greater. He could even be the means of inspiration for someone else.

I don't believe it is ever too late for healing the soul. The greatest blessings that come from healing the soul are a deep sense of joy and appreciation for life. An opportunity comes to step into the bigness we all have inside of us. For some people, that bigness will come in very small places. A body with limitations can still feel bigger than life. When you feel bigger than life, it doesn't matter what circumstances you are in. You'll find a reason to love where you are. Of course, that will also bring about more opportunity to have circumstances and environment reflect the awesomeness of you.

Even with all of my experience, I was surprised at the missing foundation. I knew that I had been feeling ungrounded and like I was unsupported in life. I hadn't thought to look at what my home was reflecting back to me. I know that sounds silly coming from me. Sometimes we forget to use our own tools.

I feel more supported than ever in my life. For the first time in my life, I can sense angels around me longing to serve me in whatever way. There is peace and connectedness I hadn't had before. I know things are on the right track for me. Won't it be fun to see where this leads?

I would love to support you in your healing journey. I have created a page that lists my Soul and Home healing services. If you feel drawn to check it out, then please do so. If you have questions or comments, feel free to ask them below or send me a message.

With love from my heart to yours,

Michele

Intuitive Healer

Healing homes and the Soul's who love them.