I have been decluttering for years. I've read a lot of books and I feel like I have a great grasp on the concepts.
From Feng Shui studies I learned that all of our stuff has energy. That energy affects us. Sometimes it's positive and sometimes it is not.
If we keep something out of guilt, that energy of guilt is stirred every time we see it or think about it. When I say see it, I mean every time your subconscious brain that takes in 10,000,000 times more information than our conscious brain can process sees it. It's always there affecting your subconscious.
The same goes for things that we keep because it reminds us of people. Sure, if that reminder lifts us up, then that's a great thing. If it reminds us of heartache, it's not the best thing. This is why after my divorce, I let go of my wedding dress. It was hard because a part of me thought it would be good to keep for my daughters. The reality was every time I saw it, I felt like a failure and a little hopeless about my future. I don't need those kinds of reminders.
When we let things go, the subconscious mind is free to think about other things. Energetically, you're also freeing up that energy to return in a more supportive way. I've heard of people releasing things and then having money show up. My girls release clothes and then somehow end up with just as many as they started with. 😏 I find that right after I release a bunch of stuff, I get a bunch of answers. The energy wants to support us but when we hold tight, it can't do that. Let your things go and you allow the energy to return in a supportive way.
From the FlyLady, I learned that sometimes we need baby steps. This is truly a concept for the overwhelmed. If you don't know where to start, just starting with a little is a positive thing. There's another concept out there that disagrees with this, but I'll get to the why of that in a minute.
Her use of rules and routines is super important. Not all of her rules make sense for me, but when they don't I can replace them with rules that do. No matter which system you use for decluttering, you must have some rules in place. An important one is putting things back in their homes after you've used them.
The FlyLady is about getting out of that funk. Getting dressed in the morning. Getting a routine in place. Getting at least something done each day. The first priority in the home is getting decluttered. Her system takes things a little slower than a big declutter. That's needed for some people. As she often says, "You can do anything in 15 minutes." She gives you a plan and a limit so you can keep the overwhelm at bay.
From Marie Kondo, I learned the value in doing the decluttering all in one go. I also learned the value of doing one category of things at a time.
Marie teaches what she calls tidying and doing it in one go. Really, she's talking about decluttering. Getting it all out at once. Don't drag it out. Make it an event. After that big event, you're left with daily maintaining. Putting things back after you use them. When you buy new, letting go of the old. You're left with regular housecleaning not decluttering.
When you do this, you have a huge sense of accomplishment. You can see the results and feel them right away. You're not dragging it out for years. Sometimes that daily declutter idea sounds great but then after a couple of weeks, you stop. Other times, you're decluttering less than you're bringing in. Other times, you just have so much stuff that a few things each day doesn't feel like it's getting anywhere. When you do it Marie's way, you don't have that dragged out feeling or that giving up energy. It's just done.
Another concept is the categories. I've heard some people complain about these. They like doing an area or a room at a time. I get it. I tend to like doing areas myself. The problem is we often keep things in multiple areas. We have bookshelves in 3 rooms or towels upstairs and downstairs. Let's not even mention where all the pens could get stored!
I've read other books and learned other things, but these are some of the biggest impacts.
FlyLady says routines and declutter first. If you can't follow the KonMari way. then if you spend a few minutes every day tackling the clutter it'll work. If you can take longer each day or better yet hire someone to help you be accountable that's even better.
Sometimes we have to work in layers. Maybe for a while, you follow FlyLady routines and for one week spend your declutter efforts in one room, followed by the next week in another room as FlyLady directs. After a while of doing this, you'll be able to take it another layer and work in categories like Marie says. Pull all of the clothes out from wherever they are. Pull out all of the books no matter what room they're in.
Sometimes we need to hire someone, paid or not. I think part of the success that comes with the KonMari method is for those actually working with her. She helps keep them accountable and gives them specific assignments. Some people find having a friend or group helps keep them accountable. Either way, when you have that accountability you seem to get more done in a shorter time. Some people need that money spent on a coach to keep them motivated. (If you're looking for one, I'm available for remote and possibly on location coaching. Schedule a consult.)
Wherever you're at or whatever level of effort you can do, remember there is great value in letting go of what doesn't bring you joy. More on that in another post. I think this one is long enough. 😉
With lots of love from my heart to yours,
Michele
